Fathers Matter More than They Know

It’s not enough to simply be a part of conception, a father is so much more than that. Study after study reinforces what generations before ours knew – the role of father is key to everyone’s well being.

After all, each of us was a child at some point. None of us came into the world fully grown. Even God Himself came down from heaven and was born as a helpless baby. While fathers are important, there are circumstances that make it impossible. Death. Dads do die. That’s when a father figure can step in and make a difference. However; in the case of an abstinent father, a surrogate can only do so much. The absence of a father through neglect leaves a hole for a lifetime. Some cope with that hole better than others.

Fathers provide more than financial support and physical protection. There have been studies that indicate having a father in the home results in a child’s ability to make calm, rational decisions. As a mother, I’m not sure how I feel about that, except to say men tend to be more logical in their choices while women tend to be ruled by their hearts. In homes with an involved father children are less likely to have disciplinary issues, tend to be more outgoing, involved in team or group activities, and are more civic-minded. I cannot help but to wonder is that simple because there is a father in the home, or is that due to the type of men who feel a sense of duty and calling to fatherhood. It’s also interesting to note from a faith perspective, fathers who are active and open with their faith tend to raise children who remain connected to faith long after leaving home.

Growing up, my grandfather was a jack of all trades, including a preacher. My Dad was raised Protestant, but converted to the Catholic Faith as a young man. We were raised Catholic. One of the things the Church emphasizes is the role of the father in a Catholic home. He is the one who is suppose to take on the responsibilities of a priestly position, especially when it comes to prayer and worship outside Sunday Mass. Praying outside of Mass wasn’t something I can remember growing up. We all knew how to pray the Rosary, and the traditions of Advent, Holy Friday, Holy Saturday, and days of obligation. They just weren’t observed beyond Mass. Today I am the only practicing Catholic in my immediate family. All the observations of my faith are not necessarily rooted in examples as a child, but rather because I felt this deep calling to my faith. As a girl I wanted to become a nun. As an adult a prayerful life outside Mass became a part of my fabric. Mom left the Church after one of her last “bad” spells. She joined the Unitarian community, the same one her psychiatrist belong to. Don’t get me started on what I think of that influence.

The roles of mothers and fathers are so important in a child’s development and well-being. I don’t think we need years of studies to know that having a positive father in the home would solve so many problems in our society today. Dads, don’t let anyone tell you that you don’t matter. You do. Just as God intended.

Have a blessed and beautiful Father’s Day, surrounded by children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren. This is your legacy.

Smoky Baby-Back Ribs with a Spicy Dry-Rub
3 tablespoon Coarse Black Pepper
1-1/2 tablespoons Salt
1 tablespoon Onion Powder
1 tablespoon Sugar
1 teaspoon Chili Powder
1 teaspoon Ancho Powder
1/2 teaspoon Chipotle Spice
1/2 teaspoon Cayenne Powder
2 teaspoons Mustard Powder
2 teaspoons Garlic Powder
3 to 4 lbs Baby-Back Pork Ribs

Day Before: Mix ingredients for dry rub, set aside. Trim excess fat from ribs and remove thin layer of skin (that silver membrane) from the back of the ribs. Lightly brush meat with a little olive oil (this helps rub “cling” to meat). Generously coat meat with rub, then rub into meat. Wrap in plastic wrap and place in refrigerator for several hours or over night for best flavor.

Day Of: Soak about 4-6 cups of wood chips for about an hour in water. This will create a nice slow smoke for the barbecue. While wood is soaking, remove ribs from the refrigerator and allow to come to room temperature.

Fill chimney with charcoal, mixing a little dry wood chips into the coals. When chimney is ready, build an indirect fire to one side of the grill. Drain wood chips. Place about 2 cups of chips on a piece of foil large enough to make a well-sealed packet. Cut a few slits into the packet to allow smoke to escape. Make a second packet with remaining wood chips. Set aside until ready to use.

Make sure the grill grate is clean and lightly oiled. Place 1 packet of chips on top of coals. Close lid, allow grill to get nice and hot and the smoke to begin to build. (Make sure vents are open so the fire can breath).

Place ribs on rack over hot coals to sear outside, about 3-5 minutes per side. Transfer to opposite side of grill for indirect cooking. Close lid, adjust vents so that the rich smoke circulates and let the ribs smoke for about an hour or so, check periodically to make sure grill continues to smoke. Remove ribs from rack, remove rack and wood chip packet. If necessary, add a little more coal to the fire. Place second packet on coals, return rack and ribs. Continue to smoke for an additional hour.

Finishing Touches
1 cup Barbecue Sauce
1/2 cup Apple Cider

Heat oven to about 325-degrees. Cover a rimmed baking sheet large enough to accommodate the ribs, with foil with 3 or 4 inches of overhang. Transfer ribs to the prepared pan. Brush with barbecue sauce. Add apple cider around the ribs to provide flavorful moisture.

Tightly wrap ribs. Place in the heated oven to bake an additional 20 minutes. Remove ribs from oven, cut into 2 or 3 bone sections for serving.

We’re serving up our smoked ribs with some sweet summer corn and ranch beans. Happy Father’s Day to all.

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The Spirit of truth will testify to me, says the Lord;
and you also will testify.