Anne in the Middle

Birth Order – that dark-age way of thinking that birth order somehow played a key role in our personalities, our strengths, and our weaknesses. Predetermined by birth, we had no say. Where did this thinking come from?

Aldred Adler, a disciple of Sigmund Freud (don’t get me started) first proposed the notion that there were stark differences among the personalities of only, middle and youngest children. I’m not here to dispute his theory. For one thing, families were very different back then, as was society and expectations. It was rare that a family had just one child or that children were nicely spaced out just so like neat little stepping stones in the family’s evolution. Families were larger if for no other reason than to support one another, contribute to the family business or work the farm. This wasn’t child-labor. It was just what families did. Older children were given responsibilities early on. As a result, it was believed that the oldest in a family naturally had certain personality traits based on their seniority in the birthing order.

Oldest Child Traits:
High-achieving, Competitive, A perfectionist, Responsible, Confident, A Natural Leader, Bossy and Stubborn

I am the oldest. Of those traits, I would say I possess only three – and probably the worst to have. I am a perfectionist, tend to be bossy and without a doubt have a stubborn streak.

Youngest Child Traits:
Freethinking, Rebellious, Extroverts, Outgoing, Attention-seeking, Social

In our family my sister is the youngest, with five years difference between us. I would say that she likes to think of herself as a freethinker. That’s a matter of opinion. Rebellious? No – that would be me growing up. She is social, and as a child sought attention, but then all children do. If anything, I see her as gaurded, reserved and at times withdrawn. But then as adults, we travel in very different social circles. In her own element, I’m sure she does just fine.

Middle Child Traits:
A mediator, Agreeable, Diplomatic, Independent, Realistic

The middle child is often called the invisible child, which would explain their birth-right ability to mediate as they are often portrayed as neutral in the overall family struggles. My sister, Ann, was the middle daughter. As an adult she often became the mediator in our family dramas. Agreeable? Diplomatic? On no – she had one wicked temper growing up. Independent? I’ll give her that, no doubt.

It’s no wonder today, with all the variable in the family structure, Birth Order is believed to be a lot of hogwash. Genetics, peer pressures, experiences as well as physical and emotional baggage play a far greater role in who we are as children, and who we choose to be as adults.

I am a strong believer in God’s plan. I believe we are who we need to be when the time comes. If you want to point to birth order or environment influences, those too are of His choosing. We need to learn to trust, and to make the most of everything that comes our way. Even saddness is not without a gift. As for my middle sister, I miss her every day.

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While I had planned to make this dish with a red pasta sauce, our market happened to be featuring a sauce imported from Italy utilizing yellow tomatoes. Too tempting to resist.

Spaghetti Casserole Bake
8 oz Spaghetti Pasta Noodles
1/2 lb Ground Beef
1/2 Yellow Onion
4 slices Bacon
2 cups Pasta Sauce
1/4 teaspoon Seasoning Salt
2 tablespoons Butter
1 large Egg
3 tablespoons Fine Parmesan Cheese
2 tablespoons Cream Cheese
2-1/2 cups Mozzarella Cheese, divided

Heat the oven to 350 degrees. Lightly grease an 8-inch square baking dish, set aside.

Bring a large pot of lightly salted water to a boil. Cook spaghetti noodles in boiling water, stirring occasionally, until tender but firm to the bite, about 11 minutes. Drain.

While the pasta cooks cut the onion in half from root to tip. Reserve half for another purpose, peel and dice remaining half. Dice bacon, set aside.

Heat a large skillet over medium heat. Cook and stir the bacon just until the fat begins to render. Add beef and onion to the skillet; continue to cook until meat is browned and onion is soft and translucent, about 8 to 10 minutes. Drain excess oil from the skillet, add spaghetti sauce and seasoned salt. Stir to blend well. Let meat simmer over medium heat until ready to assemble the casserole.

Wow – that Yellow Tomato Sauce sure does change the entire look of spaghetti sauce, doesn’t it?

Melt butter, pour into a large mixing bowl. Whisk in the egg, Parmesan and cream cheese until smooth and blended. Top mixture with drained pasta, toss to coat well.

Place 1/2 of the coated pasta mixture in the prepared baking dish. Top with 1 cup of the mozzarella, and 1/2 of the meat sauce. Repeat layers a second time, ending with the meat sauce on top. Cover with casserole dish with foil.

Bake in the heated oven for 30 minutes. Remove the foil and sprinkle with remaining 1/2 cup mozzarella. Continue to bake until top layer of cheese has melted, about 10 minutes longer.

Serve with a simple toss salad and enjoy this delicious family meal.

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God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ,
and entrusting to us the message of reconciliation.